Question

きえちゃん

英検２級ライティングの過去問です。私が書いた英作文の訂正やアドバイスを簡単でいいのでして頂きたいです🙇‍♀️

ライティング
●以下のTOPIC について, あなたの意見とその理由を2つ書きなさい。
●POINTSは理由を書く際の参考となる観点を示したものです。 ただし, これら
以外の観点から理由を書いてもかまいません。
語数の目安は 80 語 ~100語です。
解答は, 解答用紙のB面にあるライティング解答欄に書きなさい。なお,解答
欄の外に書かれたものは採点されません。
解答が TOPIC に示された問いの答えになっていない場合や, TOPIC からずれ
ていると判断された場合は,0点と採点されることがあります。 TOPIC の内容
をよく読んでから答えてください。
TOPIC
Today, some young people do not want to start working for large
companies. Do you think the number of these people will increase in
the future?
decr
POINTS
● Income
● Opportunity
● Stress

want
I disagree that the number of some young people do not
to start working for large companies.
I have two reasons why. I feel this way.
To begin with, large companies enable
many other
Many young people
7.
officers to connect
people. It brings them some good experiences.
will want to work such environment.
20
Furthermore, working for large companies have more precious
opportunities than working small ones. They will be useful
in the future so many for young people wants them.
In condusion, these are the reason why I think many
young people want to start working for large companies.

Answer 1

✨ ベストアンサー ✨

taka

全体的な構成は問題ありません。大意は理解できます。
若干の単語や表現の修正をすればＯＫです。
I disagree that the number of some young people do not want to start working for large companies.
→ I disagree that the number of young people who do not want to start working for large companies will increase in the future.
※the number of 複数名詞(…)　…の数 ／ a number of 複数名詞(…)　多くの…
I have two reasons why I feel this way.　〇
To begin with, large companies enable officers to connect many other people.
→ To begin with, large companies enable their employees to connect with many other people.
※officer 役人、警官、将校　employee 従業員　connect with …　…と関係を持つ
It brings them some good experiences.　〇
Many young people will want to work such environment.
→ Many young people will want to work in such an environment.
多くの若者はそのような環境で仕事をしたいと思うでしょう。
Furthermore, working for large companies have more precious opportunities than working for small ones.
→ Furthermore, working(S：単数) for large companies provides(V：3単現) them with more precious opportunities than working for small ones.
更に、大企業で働くことは小さな会社で働くことよりも、働く人に貴重な機会を与えてくれる。
※provide 人 with もの　人にものを提供する
They will be useful in the future.　〇
So many young people wants(V：3単現) them. → So many young people want them.
In conclusion, these are the reason(単数) why I think many young people want to start working for large companies.
→ In conclusion, these are the reasons(複数) why I think many young people want to start working for large companies.

参考にしてください。

きえちゃん

すごく丁寧にありがとうございます😭
助かりました！！

taka

You're welcome!😊