✨ 最佳解答 ✨
ほとんど訂正する個所がないくらい、よくまとまった文章になっています。
以下、更に良い内容にするために、若干の訂正と修正をしています。参考にしてください。
・One of [davantage] of club activities is that you have a chance to talk with people who are not in your school year.
→ One of [advantages] of club activities is that you have a chance to talk with people who are not in your school year.
・When you talk with older students, they may [advice] [something important] and you can learn something from [what they experienced], [such as] studying, love and human relationships.
→ When you talk with older students, they may [advise you on] [some important matters], and you can learn something from [their experiences] [in areas like] studying, love, and human relationships.
・One of [disadvatage] is that it [is] difficult to keep a good balance betwee your studies and club activities, because club activities may take up a lot of [time] your time.
→ One of [disadvantages] is that it [can be] difficult to keep a good balance between your studies and club activities, because club activities may take up a lot of your time.
・I think it is important to plan [to] how long you study [a] day.
→ I think it is important to plan how long you study [each] day.
ありがとうございます🙇✨
You're welcome!😊
One of the advantages of club activities is that you have good chances to communicate with people who are not in your school year. When you talk with other students, they may give you some good advice on important matters, and you can learn a lot from their experiences in areas like studying, love, and human relationships.
However, one of the disadvantages is that it can be very difficult to maintain a good balance between your studies and club activities, because club activities can take up a lot of time.
I think it is more important to plan how long you study each day.